Hibernating ish good ^_________^

Humm… I’ve just back, after two days with no net at home. Well, I used to get used with it so it shouldn’t be any problem for me.

Well, I have several reasons on hibernating this time. One of the reasons is that I do need time to think more about myself and not succumb on the net world, and also my relationship. Yes, I admit that somehow I have the tendencies to easily fallen for something that really interesting for me. Once I’m attracted, voila! I can be head over heels *shrugs* Well, to avoid that and also to make me less dependant to the net, I have to stay away from it for a while. That’s the only way. Sad but true *shrugs*

Still, the things between me and R***** isn’t getting better, we talked less and less (yeah, I blame you timezone!) and somehow I got the thought that I have no life aside the net. Everytime he said that he’s got something to do. I was always said “ok, go ahead…” it didn’t bug me, well, it never bugged me to be honest, but a minute later, I was like “yeah… hmm… what should I do now?” XD
Bleh, I’m pathetic. I want to talk with him for a long time, but well… it’s impossible and I know it from the start. Since my own schedule is pretty flexible and adjustable, I find no difficulties on adjusting with his schedule. But recently, since I also have many things on my hand (and also mind)… adjusting is not an easy thing to do.

And then recently, I watched some old doramas (yeah, I love you Kimura Takuya!) such old titles like Asunaro Hakusho, Long Vacation, and Love Generation (see… I love you KimuTaku!). And well, just watched the first episode of those series though…
Okay… from Asunaro hakusho –> “do you remember memories, when you’re young and you have good those good times with people that you thought you won’t ever be separated for ever.” Okay I skipped the rest of the episode and prefer to watch some horror movies instead. These words alone already remind me of many things I want to forget. At night… after I watched it… I dreamt about my old crush, and since we’re both retarded on emotion (hey, isn’t it cool! I’m retarded with emotions and often like a guy whose emotionally retarded… Hahahahahaha yeah R***** is a brick as well XD) we both confessed at wrong time, in my dream, I’m already married xD well… it’s a bt funny though xD

Okay, I lied about Love Generation part, I even didn’t watch it, I just read the title and remember the tagline “true love never runs smooth.” Err… shall I explain more? o.O

The last is, Long Vacation, I just watched it a few hours a go, so the words are still fresh. It’s in the letter written for Minami. Her ex said “I’ve fallen for a woman, she’s the type that can’t live without me, while you’re the type who will live happily for a thousand years.” Okay, this is a question that bugs me few years back. Is it wrong for a woman to be able to do many thing by herself? Is it so wrong so many guys prefer such weak and ‘dependant’ ones? Or it’s just men’s ego that wanted to be the hero on his own love story and keep protecting the damsel in distress? Gee, what a question.

I don’t know if my love story will run smooth… I don’t even care or want to think about it. What matters is now, future is important since we’re walking toward it. Still, thinking too much won’t do any good!

Song Mood : Death Cab for Cutie – I will possess your heart; Death Cab for Cutie – No Sunlight; My Bloody Valentine – Never Say Goodbye; The Cure – Just Say Yes

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